How my journey began.
I knew, when I was 8 years old, that I would leave my small town in Pennsylvania. What did I know about the world? Nothing! But I instinctively knew that I would have to get away. I decided that I would learn every language in the world so that I’d be able to communicate with everyone in the world. My first foreign language was French, and for years, I planned to go and live in France. At 21, I went to Paris as a foreign exchange student and that was the beginning of my adventure. It has been a great ride! After studying a few more languages, spending two years in Southern Italy, 10 years in Germany, long stretches at the University of Moscow, Russia, stints at the American Embassy in Moscow, Russia, 21 years in Northern Italy, and visits to more than 60 countries, the adventure continues! Daily, I learn that life is what me make of it. We can’t sit around waiting for the perfect conditions to knock on our door and invite us to our own lives. Grab it, and live it! The gift is yours!
Follow the Gentleman’s Journey.
I remember my 20 year old self as if it were yesterday. I worked 4 part-time jobs and one full-time job, and I saved every penny possible in order to finance my foreign exchange program in Paris. I don’t recall having any friends during that period. I worked too much! But I do recall thinking that there had to be much more to life than clocking in, being miserable, running to the next awful job, rinse and repeat. I was going to do something meaningful with my life! I was going to join the Peace Corps and help build wells and roads. Such idealistic and romantic thoughts…
I was going to make a difference in the lives of those who were “suffering.” Truth is, I was suffering more than anyone who didn’t have running water or paved roads. I made it to France, and it was there that the dream I had at 12 years old of seeing the world began to be a reality. I have spent the last 37 years living abroad. It has gone by in a flash. A few years ago, a family member asked me when I was going to stop “hiding” and come on home. The family member also told me that they needed someone to rock with them in a rocking chair on the porch. Rocking chair was not, is not, and will never be a part of my vocabulary. But thank you for the offer. Fast forward. I didn’t build wells or help to pave roads. And in the blink of an eye, I am now eligible for retirement. I have now visited 61 countries, yet I still feel an emptiness. Something is still missing. But I have also learned beyond measure. What I have found in visiting those 61 countries is that WE ARE ALL THE SAME.
WE ARE ALL THE SAME.
We want our families to be well. Russia taught me that. Tajikistan taught me than no man is a stranger and that a table and a cup of tea are at the ready for any person that passes. France taught me that food should be fresh and should be consumed with pleasure and with measure. Italy has taught me to enjoy a glass of wine. Azerbaijan taught me that in the midst of a storm, the sun will shine again. Kazakhstan, from you, I learned that even though a government uses you as a nuclear test site, in the morning, you pick up, rebuild, and move on. You find safe territory and you plant crops and you get on with the business of living.
So back to that 12 year old self and to that 20 year old self. Do not believe the hype! Travel! See the world! Never slow down! We all have the answers within. We really do. But others have taught us that we are not wise enough to make decisions for ourselves. Poke them in the eye, pick up your branch and bandana containing your worldly possessions, and bid farewell to grief.
Many years ago I read an article about the tennis great, Billie Jean King. She wrote about how we work and work in order to acquire “stuff.” Then at a certain age, we want to downsize. How true! I am there! I need blank walls. I need fresh squeezed orange juice and black coffee. Thank you again, Italy. I need my books and I need a piano. That is my happiness.
Did I ever think the word retirement would be a part of my vocabulary? Eventually, I suppose. But it is real! I can guarantee one thing….from misery I will take my leave, but from life, I will never retire. Don’t wait for retirement to make a life. Live! Live now! Live free(ly)! Listen to the Silver Haired Gentleman. He loves you!